The 2013 Lord Stanley Cup Playoffs Round 2: Semifinals

Yeah, yeah, I'm a little late to the game again. I have a life and am not getting paid like so many other bloggers out there, so screw me. Round 1 was fun and had some intensity, Round 2 promises no less.

MY PICKS
Western Conference

• #1 Chicago Blackhawks vs. #7 Detroit Red Wings - Detroit made a major upset, *ahem* as I predicted they would, in beating the Ducks in Round 1, but they will be little match for Chicago, especially if their defense keeps lagging.
• #5 Los Angeles Kings vs. #6 San Jose Sharks - Beating the Canuckleheads was one thing, but taking on the Kings will be a whole different game for the Sharks. Kings will take this one.

Eastern Conference

• #1 Pittsburgh Penguins vs. #7 Ottawa Senators - Ottawa has more fire power and the better goalie. They also don't have a complete d-bag in the form of Crysby. That's just win-win really. Senators will take it.
• #4 Boston Bruins vs. #6 New York Rangers - New York's defense shut down Washington's Ovechkin in Round 1; that is saying a LOT right there, however they lack the power up front. Boston is more balanced, has sharper lines and the higher rated defense. Sing Loud, Sing Proud for Boston.

Standings as of 5/16

The 2013 Lord Stanley's Cup Playoffs: Quarter Finals

It has to be admitted that I am not a huge sports fan. My parents were/are not very in to sports, so I had not influence there. Being on the chubbier side most of my life, gym class was more a source of embarrassment than enjoyment for me. Sure, I went to a couple homecoming games in high school to try and be in with the in crowd, but I was more focused on the guys than the game and, ultimately, I was, am and will always be a nerd, so that just wasn't my scene.

Flash forward to a few years ago and I discover hockey. I mean, I previously was vaguely aware of its existence; The Mighty Ducks was a good movie series, right? At least it had the talented eye-candy that is Joshua Jackson, but I digress. A now good friend of mine is a die hard hockey fan; like, has played since he was a kid, continues to play recreationally, has three kids playing (one of whom is a total rock star goalie) and even keeps up on the international teams. Thus, as tends to happen in friendship, his passion began to rub off on me. Now, it's not a huge hobby for me and I'm still learning the different calls, rules, players and trying to remember what all the stats mean, but I really do enjoy it even without that knowledge. Ultimately I've come to determine that hockey is one of the more challenging among sports that requires a multitude of skills, focus and endurance on the part of the players. That, in addition to my observation that hockey seems to be the only major league sport played in the U.S. that A) didn't "originate" here and B) is not only played internationally, but also actively welcomes players from around the world to play in the league, combine to make hockey, IMHO, the most bad-ass of sports. The action, the rivalries, the fights, its just exciting!

So. Here we are and, after a disgustingly long lock out, we finally had a (very) short season and are now into playoffs of Lord Stanley's Cup! W00t! Yeah, yeah I'm a little late coming in here, but A) I have a life and B) the inspiration for this blog/design project came after the playoffs had already started, thus requiring some time to complete. Below is the bitchin' bracket that I've fashioned up in Photoshop (thanks to sportslogos.net for most of the team logos). The little puck under each team shows how many playoff games they've won - notice the Vancouver Canucks (or Canuckleheads as my friend calls them) has no puck because they have not won a game. I'll update this each day as the quarter finals progress. I've also circled the teams I'm rooting for to win, which were of course chosen based on my own odd favoring system and some trace knowledge of team prowess.

Final scores of the 2013 Stanley Cup Conference Quarterfinals!

MY PICKS
In the Western Conference we have:

• #1 Chicago Blackhawks vs. #8 Minnesota Wild - Totes going with the Blackhawks here. I do try to root for the home team, and the Wild did pick up some great payers this year, but they just don't have it this time around, especially not to beat out the 'hawks.
• #2 Anaheim Ducks vs. #7 Detroit Red Wings - I have no legit reason for choosing the Wings here other than they are the older team with a better, more classic logo. Yep, there's my design nerd coming out.
• #3 Vancouver Canucks vs. #6 San Jose Sharks - Sharks. By and large, they have just bee playing better than the Canucks this year, even if they didn't have the points to make the higher conference ranking. I also have to admit some credit to my friend's preference in this match up.
• #4 St Louis Blues vs. #5 Los Angeles Kings - I'm going with the Kings on this one. My first reason is that they took the Cup last year. My second reason is that Wil Wheaton is a hockey fan, who lives in LA and thus roots for the Kings. Yep, I'm a nerd like that. I also recognize that this reasoning likely puts me on Sheldon Cooper's hit list.

And in the Eastern Conference:

• #1 Pittsburgh Penguins vs. #8 New York Islanders - Islanders. Why? Because Cindy Crysby is a schmuck. Period. And I will root for any team opposing him. I would root for the Austrian Hitlers if it was a team opposing that tool. Go Islanders!
• #2 Montreal Canadiens vs. #7 Ottawa Senators - I'm going with the Senators here purely on the basis of they have a cooler name and logo. Oh, and 7 is my lucky number, I think that played into the initial selection too.
• #3 Washington Capitals vs. #6 New York Rangers - I went with the Rangers on this one. I genuinely dislike that the Caps don't have much in the way of a logo and while Ovechkin is a very solid player, he's always struck me as a bit of an egotistical tool. No Crysby, mind you, but just rubs me wrong.
• #4 Boston Bruins vs. #5 Toronto Maple Leafs - I have to go Boston here. It is a town I've always wanted, full of awesome history and significance for the U.S. It's a team that stands out in my mind for its history in the sport and clout in the league. I also totally prefer the black and yellow color combo to blue and white...maybe its a bit of Hufflepuff in me.

* Update 5/7 * - Okay, so I fell asleep last night before updating the bracket. Oops. Good news is, all my boys came up golden last night! The Blackhawks and Senators are both up to 3 games; Islanders are tied 2-2 with the Pens now; and even after the Canucks finally began to make a showing and put some fight into it, it was too little too late and the Sharks chomped 'em, making a 4 game sweep of the quarter finals series. Good night indeed. I promise to update the bracket after tonight's games.

*Update 5/8* - Life got busy and I didn't get to watch much of the games tonight. Thankfully I discovered the handy NHL app last week and could keep up on all the goals and such while I was out running errands.   My boys in Boston pulled off another win bringing them up to 3-1 over the Maple Leafs - mmm, mapley delicious victory; LA Kings also boost up with a third game win over St Louis; The Rangers evened up the score with Washington; finally, in the can't-win-'em-all category, the Red Wings fell to the Ducks in OT...fowl I cry! It was still a good hat trick of wins for my bracket though.

*Update 5/9* - Bummer of the evening is that the Penguins took game 5, setting them at 3-2 against the Islanders. That said, Tomas Vokoun stepped into the net for the Pens tonight (instead of their usual Marc-Andre Fleury) and completely shutout the Islanders clearly lending to their win tonight. Pretty damn impressive. Crysby can still suck eggs. In better news, Chicago Blackhawks beat out MN Wild and took game 5 advancing them to the conference semifinals. I'm a bit bummed to have the home team out of the running, but I expected it all along. Next year boys. Also, it was so awesome to have Harding starting even after being taken out so early in the last game. Finally the Ottawa Senators also advanced to the semis, beating out the Canadiens in their game 5. So a pretty decent night, even if my picks didn't take a hat-trick of wins.

*Update 5/11* - Well assballs. After an intense game, the Islanders fell to the Pens in OT, sending the Pens (along with Crysby) into the semifinals.  I wanted fish sticks dammit! I missed the games yesterday as I had plans, but was both happy and disappointed with the results. On the the down side, The Maple Leafs beat the Bruins, ruining what cold have been Boston's advancement to the semis. Also bummed that Washington took a win over the Rangers. On the upside, the Kings advanced to the semis. Also, I'm optimistic for tomorrow's games; Boston has won both of the previous games while in Toronto, meaning they could likely take over Toronto tomorrow. The Rangers, meantime, do better when as home, which is where tomorrow's action will happen meaning we could very likely see this match-up pushed to a game 7 on Monday eve. The more (hockey) the merrier :)

*Update 5/12* - Happy Mother's Day hockey fans! Well, Boston lost in Toronto, but that means a game 7 tomorrow night - w00t! Also, the Rangers proved me right, beating the Capitals and pushing a game 7 tomorrow night in D.C. Lastly, I called it bitches! Detroit defeated the Ducks, completing the line-up of the Western Conference Semifinalss; Red Wings will play the Blackhawks (an original 6 match-up no less!) and, last year's cup winners, the LA Kings will square off against the San Jose Sharks. This is going to be exciting!

*Update 5/13* - DAMN did Boston rock it! Coming from behind like that was brilliant! I'm playing some Dropkick Murphies for them right not :) It should be noted that the Rangers overpowered the Capitals as well. This means that all but one of my picks moved forward to the semifinals. Friggin Penguins stole my perfect score, but they'll get theirs in the semis, and then there will be fish sticks for all!!! Mwahahahaaaa! See you in the semis lovlies!

John Green and Other Awesome, Nerdy Things

My always awesome friend C-Monster introduced me to The VlogBrothers, an amazingly entertaining, clever, smart and nerdy video blog by brothers Hank and John Green. Hank is the founder of EcoGeek.org. John is an award-winning YA* author. Upon learning that last bit, I realized I had to read one of his books... if not all of them. So, being kinda broke, I hit up my local library's website and requested one of his titles (yes, at random. I'm not picky). A few days later, in came An Abundance of Katherines for my reading delight.  And a delight is has been thus far. Yes, "thus far", because I'm enjoying the book and the author's style so much that I'm writing about it before I've even finished it!

Here's how it went down. On page 1 the main character (Colin) is thinking about Archimedes shouting "Eureka!" There was also a footnote explaining the Greek translation of "eureka". My thought was something like, "I already knew that, but an informative footnote in a novel colors me impressed".  By page 10, there had been a few more footnotes that were informative, witty (sometimes both) or simply said, "More on that later." It was on this page that I was fairly sure I was going to want to own this book. By 'fairly sure' I mean I had made the majority of the climb up the mountain and was within sight of the summit, but not quite there because at only page 10 out of 215, there is a lot of room for disappointment.  Page 30 sealed the deal by containing a joke about sodomy and a footnote containing a Venn diagram! I laughed myself to tears. While I will likely finish the library's edition, I will be venturing to buy my own copy in the very near future.

On that note, to the right of the previous paragraph is a picture of the cover of the book I'm currently reading. See that? Right there? The one with all the heads on it? Well, while searching for that image to put on here, I also found THIS image of an alternate (?) cover for the book!



I have to say that I like this cover much more. It's my inner design nerd coming out. The color use is more appealing, I don't have some soulless-eyed chick(s) staring out at me and I dig the title-as-a-math-equation relation to the story. Now, I have not done a great deal of searching at this point, but if someone can help me find a copy with this kickin' cover, I would be verrry grateful. Like cookies-for-you grateful.**



Moving right along to other awesome nerdery, I'm getting hooked on The Nerdist podcast. I discovered it in a bass ackwards kinda fashion in that I was watching The Walking Dead on AMC and suddenly there was this fun after-show called The Talking Dead hosted by Chris Hardwick (hot!). I mentioned The Talking Dead in class the following Thursday and a classmate got all excited and told me to check out The Nerdist, which is also hosted by Chris Hardwick, usually with Jonah Ray and Matt Mira, is just freaking hilarious! They have awesome guests (like Wil Wheaton*** (heart) Adam Savage (boom) and Neil Gaiman (brilliant) or when they don't have guests still manage to give my funny bone a hander. Go. Listen. Good times will be had. The podcast was recently turned into a TV show on BBC America and I aim to start watching that regularly... or as regularly one can for a show that's been ordered as "specials" by the channel. In this same vein, my bestie J-bot snagged us tickets to go see them live when the tour comes to town in March. You can't see it, but I'm doing my happy dance.

In the food realm, my instructor A mentioned this thing called Cookie Butter.  I'll type that again for your comprehension, because if you're like me, your eyes just bugged out of your head. Cookie Butter. I made a jaunt to Trader Joe's yesterday and procured some. It's a spread made with crushed biscuits and tastes a bit like gingerbread. It has definite nom factor. I've had it on celery, on chunky cinnamon toast, on matzo (yep, we eat Jew-food in this house) and now...cookie butter on a cookie! Just because I could.

That's all for awesome, nerdy things today folks. DFTBA****


*YA is book industry speak for the "Young Adult" genre. Special, nerdy terms? Yep. Get used to it.
** I was going to go dirty there and say 'blowjobs-for-you grateful', but I realized that A) that's a bit extreme, even for an awesome book and B) if you're a chic who helps me get the book, you're kinda left out of that reward system and that's not fair.
***I'm currently listening to the Wil Wheaton Nerdist podcast and learned that Chris and Wil are long-time friends and used to be roommates. This made me realize that that would make for an awesome, nerdy threesome! HOW have I never come to that idea before?!
**** An initialism (not an acronym because acronyms are pronounceable) used by the VlogBrothers that stands for Don't Forget To Be Awesome.

Random Post #1

Hello. Been awhile, I know. Fall quarter had me going crazy and my "break" was not really due to the holidays and work and such. C'est la vie.

My holidays were nice. For the family portion I made mini cherry pies using a muffin tin. Lessons were learned about using a proper-sized biscuit cutter. The best gift I got from fam has to be a tie between the first two volumes of Good Eats by Alton Brown and a killer fashion ring. I got some awesome gifts from my friends. Jo, Dawn and Heather all did great on our crafting-only gifts for each other. However I do have to say that the best gift by far goes to Chris for the TARDIS mug and Green Day Blue Grass CD. Sorry gals, but it's hard to beat the TARDIS... literally.

I've also been very distracted by YouTube lately.  Here are some of the awesome things I've been watching:

My Drunk Kitchen - Cookery, booze and one seriously funny lady! In her case, I feel it's best to begin at the beginning.


C.G.P. Gray - Smart and entertaining explanations of things. This guy is like the Alton Brown of everything. This is his most recent and I completely agree with him. Fuck pennies.


Vlog Brothers - Two brothers. One channel. Copious amounts of fun nerdery that will leave you smarter than before you watched. Bonus point: John is the John Green of YA literature fame; I haven't read his books, but after viewing this channel, I am definitely going to.


MukPuddy - Some hilarious animations that make me want to be an animator.


Chap-hop - Unquestionably the most entertaining and awesome music genre to arise in some time.


In fact I've been so distracted by YouTube that I've had two discs from Netflix since October. Shit. Gotta get on that this weekend.

Back on the 7th I went to my first viewing of the musical Les Miserables! That was pretty fucking sweet. Big thanks you my friend J for just randomly buying the tickets and telling me we were going. It was pretty sweet. The sets and lighting effects were great. The main men and Eponine we fantastic. Fantine was really warbly though, so I wasn't too disappointed when she died 10 minutes in.  I'm not sure if it was costumer choice or error that Marius blended in with most of the other revolutionary students in the battle scene. Personally, I found that annoying. High point of the night was the pre-show visit to Candyland and getting some sponge candy and key lime kisses (they're like butterscotch buttons, but lime! I never knew those existed!).

Quick Update

Because I'm a busy little beaver. This post is for my friend H.  She asked if I had any blogs.  I said, 'yes'.  She then called me out for not posting in over a month.  *shame face* Between a full class load, work, and the general weather making me rather lazy I have not gotten around to it.  So here's a quick update.

School is going alright.  My online class, Digital Photography, does not motivate me enough.  I like taking pictures, but when I'm forced to do topics that don't interest me, it's difficult.  I don't want to take family portraits and discuss the difficulties faced during the session. I work retail, that alone has given me enough varying people experience that my brain can go wild with all the issues that could come up in a situation where I am making people sit down so I can take their pictures... peoples be crazy!

Work-wise... it's retail. Same ol' bollocks.

Friends. I have awesome friends. I suck at reaching out when I'm in a down mood. I figure that these people have enough going on in their respective lives, they don't need to drop everything just to listen to my, admittedly sometimes silly and irrational, negativity. And there's the rub for me; typically I can assess what is making me feel a certain way, what the cause is, but that doesn't necessarily alleviate the problem. Anyhoozles, my friends always make me feel great, even if they don't know it. Here's a ginormous 'Thank you!' going out to each of you. Upon request I will give you a giant hug next time I see you, but I know touchy-feely not everybody's "thing" so I'm with-holding the urge to simply throw one at you.

Car.  My happy little car, Vinnie, has not been as happy for a few months now. He was making all sorts of loud, grindy noises.  When a front light finally went out, I took him in.  Mister Mechanic Dude noticed the noise.  One problem snowballed into 4 and $390 later, Vinnie is once again happy. In all honesty, if I won the lottery, I'd pay him off, fix him up, and use him as a turn in on what I really want; a RAV 4... who may or may not also get named Vinnie, depends on his 'tude.

Family. Oy. I want out. Like I'd give $20 handers behind a liquor store to make the money to get out. I'm not though... possibly only because of the illegality of prostitution and the fact that I'd have to touch people I don't want to. If I was a hooker, I'd totally up my charges for ugly people. And it's not discrimination because attractiveness is subjective (well, mostly).

OK, now I should really get back to the homework that has me sitting in a cafe on this, the first snowy day of Minnesota's 2011 autumn.

Fish Sticks and Custard - er, Mango Sherbet

I finally got into the kitchen.  School is nearing the end of the quarter, work is - well, work - and life... it's all just a juggling act and I only ever learned to juggle two balls at once, so it's been a show for sure.

So happy kitchen time this night consisted of "fancy" fish sticks - they're fancy for a couple reasons, we'll get to that later - and mango-coconut sherbet.  I was excited for this!  Not only because both sounded über tasty from the recipes, but because it'd been a while since I'd had the time to play in the kitchen (last week's chipotlé flank steak with Gorgonzola sauce doesn't count, I was hurried).

Fancy Fish Sticks & Sauce...and beer.

The fish sticks I cut from a fillet of cod mum had picked up late last week.  Yep, that's right, cut them myself - see, fancy.  Then they were dredged first in a flour and black pepper mix, then into an wet mixture (best ingredient of which was lager) and then coated in a mix of Panko bread crumbs, pumpkin kernels and spices.  See, fancy!  Then I faux-fried them - aka put 'em on a heated, oiled sheet in the oven - and voila! Delicious, better-for-you-than-the-originals, "fancy" fish sticks!  Served those babies up with a dip concocted from low-fat mayo and sour cream, spicy brown mustard, fresh lime juice and a Cajun seasoning mix I'd already made myself and I had a great, proud-of-myself dinner.


But what is dinner without dessert? Blasphemy I say!  So I through the whopping 4 ingredients for mango-coconut sherbet into the blender and hit "liquify".  After all was happily blended I flipped the "on" switch on my Cuisinart Pure and poured all that sweet orange goo into the awaiting, frozen tub that was rotating almost as much giddy fervor as I was feeling. 30 or so minutes later the deliciousness was done. Well, sort of; you see it has to be put into a container and then in the freezer to solidify more, so I did that.  While I waited, I toasted up some shredded coconut I had.  Even though it wasn't solid yet, I could wait no longer; so I dished it up, topped it with the now golden  and nutty coconut sprinkles that I'd freed from the oven and spooned my taste buds up some tropical tastiness.

Mango-coconut awesome! I mean sherbet.

Note: I don't have the best camera for this sorta thing, but I do what I can with what I have :)

Music Awesomeness

Chris recently hooked himself up with a Logitech Revue and that thing is sweet.  It's an adapter that turns your existing tele set into an internet/smart tele. It comes with Google TV and is expected to have access to the Android app market by years end. In the meantime, it works great with Netflix and surfs the web very well. Needless to say, I'm hoping our deal to move in together next year is still on, so that I will  this piece of technologic fun.

The Logitech revue

So last night we were hanging and via boingboing.net discovered a music genre that is definitely becoming my new favorite.  Ladies and gentlemen I present to you, Chap-hop!

Professor Elemental - "Fighting Trousers"

The Little Things

I've worked 5 days in a row now. I had to be to work at 7am all but Sunday.  This means my alarm goes off at 5:20 which gives me enough time to wake, quick shower, get a bit pretty and grab some breakfast before heading to work. 

Tomorrow (and all weekend actually) I'm off and while I am really excited for my MN Zoo outing with a few friends (finally get to see the penguins!) there is something I am looking forward to much, much more.

"What could that possibly be?" You must be wondering.

Being able to sleep-in 'til 7:30 and having the time to take a shower long enough to shave my legs.  Yep, I have an exciting life.

Pineapple Jerk Pork Chops

One slow day I was working at the e-reader counter and downloaded the (then current) March issue of Everyday Food.  In scanning the contents, I noticed an article about pineapple (one of my favorite fruits); it started with a guide on selecting and cutting the prickly tropical fruit and then had a number of recipes, the first of which was for jerk pineapple pork chops... nom!  Obviously, I snatched up an ink & paper issue of the magazine from the newsstand as soon as I was off work.  After several weeks with school and other life things roadblocking my cookery, I found the time to prepare a delicious din for mum and me (and then took several more weeks before blogging about it.)


Ingredients
2/3 of a whole (4 pound) pineapple, peeled
1 bunch scallions, sliced crosswise into 1-inch piece
1/2 small habanero or 1 large jalapeno, stemmed and seeded (I used two medium ones)
2 tsp dried thyme
4 cloves of garlic, smashed and peeled
1 1/2 tsp ground allspice
4 bone-in pork chops, 3/4-inch-thick and about 6oz each (I bought a loin on the cheap and sliced it myself)
course salt and ground pepper
2 Tbsp extra-virgin olive oil

Scallions, spices, garlic and jalapenos

Pineapple

1 - Cut four 1/2-inch-thick rounds from the pineapple and set aside. Cut the remaining pineapple into large chunks, discarding the core. In a food processor (or blender in my case), combine pineapple chunks, scallions, chile(s), thyme, garlic, and allspice and pulse until coarsely chopped. Reserve 1/4 cup of this marinade and refrigerate.

It doesn't look like much, but just wait!

 2 - Season pork with salt & pepper and place in a 9x13 glass baking dish along with the pineapple round. Top with remaining pineapple marinade and turn pork and pineapple to coat. Cover with plastic wrap and refrigerate 1 hour (up to 4 hours).

3. In a large nonstick skillet, hear 1 Tbsp of the olive oil over medium-high. Working in two batches, brush the marinade off the pork and cook chops until browned and cooked through, about 10 minutes per batch, flipping once (reduce heat if pork begins to overbrown.) When chops are complete, add 1 Tbsp oil to the skillet. Brush marinade from pineapple rounds and cook until golden brown in spots; 5 to 7 minutes, flipping once.




4. Serve pork and rounds with reserved pineapple marinade.

A complete meal

Delicious!

The meal was delicious! Tender and flavorful pork with the savory marinade accented with caramelized sweetness of the browned pineapple.   If you dig Caribbean fair, I highly suggest giving this recipe a go.

Favorite Things

So I needed to do an entry for this blog. I have been ignoring it like a ginger-headed stepchild - which is a little ridiculous for me to say because I would probably love a ginger stepchild. I've been busy, wrapped up in school, work and life, so it wasn't intentional ignoring, but I digress. I borrowed a list of 30 things to blog about in 30 days (I will totally take longer) from a friend who'd posted it on her blog a while back (thanks Jo and Dawn).  First up I'm listing 20 of my favorite things... no roses or kittens here folks.

1. My friends - My best friends especially (you know who you are). They are such very special and amazing individuals. I'm really lucky to have them in my life. You guys rock! And honestly, you're why I can make it through the bad days.
2. My mom - Best ever! The most understanding, generous, loving person I know.
3. Hugs/Cuddling - Hello. My name is Kris and I'm a cuddle slut. But I have to be pretty comfortable with someone before I get touchy with them, otherwise I'll cringe away.
4. Otters - They are adorable, frolicky, amazingly smart and tough. If I could choose so, I'd be reincarnated as one in my next life.
5. Pretty knickers - There is something about wearing a fun/fancy/sexy pair of knickers that makes me feel even prettier. Even if it's a basic cotton hipster/boyshort (my preferred style) in a really fun pattern, it's a special part of the ensemble that only I know about...well, unless I choose to let someone see 'em. Shopping for them is fun too.
6. Cooking/Baking - Whether it's from scratch, from a box, or dough from a tube, I dig cookery. It's fun, it can be challenging, I can get all creative and experimental with it and it's science (<3 Alton Brown)! Plus, the result is always tasty... unless you fuck up your sugar for salt or something, which I have never done *knock on wood*
7. Lime - Whether it's limeade (waaaaay better than lemonade), key lime pie, freshly squirted over some chicken or fish or making margaritas, it just has such a fresh and lively flavor that is unparalleled. It's the top dog of citrus.
8. My six-shooter earring - I always get a compliment when I wear them. Since they are studs I can wear them casually or add some edge to an otherwise classy/dressy ensemble. Definitely one of the top ten best birthday presents I've received in my 28 years.
9. The smell of craft/art supply stores - A motley aroma of wood, paints, glues, fabric, pastels... it's the smell of potential magic, waiting to be harnessed and manipulated into something awesome. My grandfather owned his own art & drafting supply business when I was younger; I loved the special days I got to go in to work with mom.
10. Buttons/Pins - These little suckers are irresistible. I have quite a nice collection going. They are a small and fun way to say something, show support or just your fun side.  I wish I could afford the tools to make my own, that'd be awesome. In the meantime I need to build an awesome way to display my collection. That goes ditto to my shot-glass collection; not quite as large, but equally cool.
11. Cake balls - My friend D turned me onto this recipe and I haven't looked back since.  It's cake, mixed with frosting, formed into a bite-sized ball and dipped in candy coating. They are a sweet explosions of AWESOME in your mouth! Also, it turns out I kinda rock at makin' 'em, so now I'm formulating new things to try with them.
12. The smell of Gardenias - Generally speaking, I hate perfumes. I use scented oils instead; there's no alcohol, no allergens and all that crap. Gardenia is one of the few I can rely on liking.
13. Books - "The pen is mightier than the sword." Books can inspire, enchant, motivate, educate, frighten, empower. They can take you to lands faraway or around the corner, empathize with or at least understand viewpoints previously foreign to you, make you feel emotions you didn't know you were capable of... Books are a special kind of magic. 10a. I love the smell of books and book stores.
14. Movies - Similar to books, movies are another kind of wizardry. They can do all the things I listed above, but through a different medium, a visual one, that is equally fantastic. However I do not like the smell of movie stores or theaters.
15. Pineapple - Nature's candy! I could eat this shit all day. I also enjoy cutting up fresh pineapple, not quite sure why...
16. Crafting - I like creating things, the contentment that comes when finishing a project. Painting, gluing, jewelry making, paper crafting, sewing, X-stitching... I have yet to pick up crocheting though.
17. Ice cream/gelato/sorbet - Whatever the name this cold, smooth, scoop of delicious wonderment has long been a favorite of mine. Forget a candy store, my eyes grow wide when I walk into a creamery. Flavor favorites include coffee, rocky road, cookies & cream, Ring Mountain's lime jalapeno sorbet and salted peanut gelato (not together though), Ben & Jerry's S'mores and Americone Dream... yeah, I'll just stop here.
18. My new wallet - I bought it shortly before my Vegas trip and am in love with it. It's has the perfect amount of pockets and folds out beautifully. It's big enough that I could carry just it around like a clutch without being all bulky and awkward. Also, it's by Vera Wang who, for some reason, is a fashion designer I've always admired.  Lastly it is a gorgeous dark green color with tarnished brass snap and logo detail, chic with a bit of edge; love it.
19. Cursing - This one should really be called linguistic/etymology, but anyone who knows me knows that I love to swear like a sailor. The more balls-out creative and mind-fuckingly outrageous the better.
20. Coconut - This tasty fruit has such a unique texture and flavor. It can be made sweet or savory - ice cream, baked goods, coating shrimp/chicken, toasted and coated with chocolate, etc). On a trip to Duluth, my friends and I went to a great little cafe/restaurant that made a coconut peach muffin; that thing sexually harassed my mouth and I loved it! As an added benefit, coconut is one thing I'm positive my dad hates, thereby ensuring anything I get with it will go untouched, mwa ha ha!
21. Dogs - Fuck rules, I'm making this thing longer. I've long lived in apartments and thereby been limited to my pet options. I've done fish, rodents and cats. No more; I want a dog. They are adorable, loveable companions that are waaay more fun to play with that cats (I'm all felined out). I obviously have to wait for my living and financial situations to improve, but in the meantime I have a number of friends with awesome pups that I love to lavish my affection upon.
22. Wing Night/Free Taco Bar - There's a joint named Bunny's in SLP that my mate Chris introduced me to, where we've become regulars. Seriously, we always seem to get the same server and he now knows my drink of choice... last time he even noticed that I was rocking contacts instead of my usual glasses! Anyway, they have late night specials on their delicious wings and FREE taco bar!  Mmm, taco bar...

It's NPM Yo! part I

April is National Poetry Month - snazzy, I know. As I was considering a writing degree before settling on GD, I'm thought it'd be fun to share some poetry. Good stuff (and maybe some humorously bad stuff) found over my years of taking lit and writing classes (English geek? Yes, a bit). Maybe I'll even share some of my own...

First up, a couple war related poems.

Dulce et Decorum Est by Wilfred Owen

Bent double, like old beggars under sacks,

Knock-kneed, coughing like hags, we cursed through sludge,

Till on the haunting flares we turned our backs

And towards our distant rest began to trudge.

Men marched asleep. Many had lost their boots

But limped on, blood-shod. All went lame; all blind;

Drunk with fatigue; deaf even to the hoots

Of tired, outstripped Five-Nines that dropped behind.

Gas! Gas! Quick, boys! – An ecstasy of fumbling,

Fitting the clumsy helmets just in time;

But someone still was yelling out and stumbling

And flound'ring like a man in fire or lime...

Dim, through the misty panes and thick green light,

As under a green sea, I saw him drowning.

In all my dreams, before my helpless sight,

He plunges at me, guttering, choking, drowning.

If in some smothering dreams you too could pace

Behind the wagon that we flung him in,

And watch the white eyes writhing in his face,

His hanging face, like a devil's sick of sin;

If you could hear, at every jolt, the blood

Come gargling from the froth-corrupted lungs,

Obscene as cancer, bitter as the cud

Of vile, incurable sores on innocent tongues, –

My friend, you would not tell with such high zest

To children ardent for some desperate glory,

The old Lie: Dulce et decorum est
Pro patria mori.*

*translation: It is sweet and fitting to die for one's country.

Facing It by Yusef Komunyakaa

My black face fades,
hiding inside the black granite.
I said I wouldn't
dammit: No tears.
I'm stone. I'm flesh.
My clouded reflection eyes me
like a bird of prey, the profile of night
slanted against morning. I turnthis way – the stone let's me go.

I turn that way – I'm inside
the Vietnam Veterans Memorial
again, depending on the light
to make a difference.
I go down the 58,022 names,
half-expecting to find
my own in letters like smoke.
I touch the name Andrew Johnson;
I see the booby trap's white flash.
Names shimmer on a woman's blouse
but when she walks away
the names stay on the wall.

Brushstrokes flash, a red bird's
wings cutting across my stare.
The sky. A plane in the sky.
A white vet's image floats
closer to me then his pale eyes
look through mine. I'm a window.
He's lost his right arm
inside the stone. In the black mirror
a woman's trying to erase names:
No, she's brushing a boy's hair.

Plague of Indecision

Recently I went on a real, honest, plane-trip-required vacation to Las Vegas,NV. While there, my friends and I went on a self-guided tour of the Ethel M. Chocolate Factory.  It was founded 25 years ago by Forrest Mars Sr. who named the company after his dear mother, from whom he'd learned about quality chocolate-making in their family kitchen. They do their chocolatiering in small batches and their products are preservative free. And, if you are wondering, "chocolate + 'Mars' is that guy...?" Yes, he is that Mars of chocolate fame. But I digress...

While the tour was pretty boring - not much was happening that day, mostly packing - they did have a great little store and, being a chocolate lover, I went ahead and got a hand-picked selection of 12 chocolates for a mere $18. It sounds like a lot, but most of the chocolates in their cases were individually priced at $2/piece; once I counted no less than five that I absolutely had to try, the upgrade seemed the best choice.

Now I'm home and have gone through all but 5 chocolates:

Pecan Brittle

Key Lime Ganache (dark chocolate)

Coconut Delight (dark chocolate)

Sea Salted Caramel (milk chocolate)

Honey Truffle (dark chocolate)

I go to get a treat today and I cannot decide which one to eat! The remaining chocolates are some of my favorite flavors, thus why I've passed them over until now (best for last)! This I went to do 20 minutes ago and still haven't decided (although I've done other things that have taken up brain time). 

I can be horribly indecisive;I can stand/walk around in Target for 30 minutes comparing two things before making a choice. Why am I this way? I have no idea.  If someone wants to give me a free psych rundown, I'd love it. Seriously, unless I have a predetermined list, I should not be allowed to shop without someone there to force me to make a decision...

Shopping chaperone needed! 

Volunteer position. Please apply via e-mail. 

Multiple positions available.

Sin City, Here I Come!

In 1 day I'll be in Las Vegas! YEEEEEEE!!!!! :D  

I am so excited!  This will be the biggest vacation I've ever been on.  I've done a number of road trips to places in and around MN -  a weekend in Duluth, a 24 hour trip to Madison,WI for a concert - but have never had a real, air travel required, destination vacation before.  The closest has been when I participated in KCACTF in college and got to travel to St. Louis,MO and Denver,CO, but those were school related so I didn't get the opportunity to really experience those cities (I'd love to go back to Denver).

Monday morning, my friends and I will be on our way to Vegas!  I'm almost completely packed but for a few things I will use tomorrow and my yet-to-be-decided vacation read.  We're staying at New York, New York hotel, four days and three nights.  Thus far we have some loosely based plans; catch some free fountain shows and the Fremont Street Experience, gamble, shop, maybe some sex and blow, you know the usual thing. Hopefully we won't get roofied by the fourth, newer member of our party... 

Although maybe I ought to text "check the roof" to my fellow cohorts each evening...

I just checked weather.com to see what the climes will be for my stay on The Strip; the forecast is either "sunny" or "mostly sunny" with highs up 86 and lows at 55 degrees.  After the slushy downpour I drove in this last Tuesday, I could cum from the sheer giddy I feel at reading that forecast!

Stroking The Anemone

Questionable Content is my favorite online comic.  THIS recent strip is particularly hilarious because it deals with genital slang, which is always a fun topic!  I'll give you a minute to read the strip before continuing with my commentary... 

go ahead, don't be shy...it's some funny stuff...

OK, I'm totally with Faye on this one! I'm all for fun euphemisms and dirty talk, but that shit would turn me off too. Sea cucumber?!  Ew!  Have you seen a sea cucumber?! Cuz lemme tell you, it does not look like the friendly, green phallus you pick up at your local produce section...

California sea cucumber

See what I mean? I would not want one of those things near, let alone in my v-bag.  And speaking of lady bits, "fuzzy clam"?  Seriously, I know there are not as many euphemisms for the anatomical jewel that is the vulva as there are for the penis, but seriously, that's one we can do without thankyouverymuch.

So, what are your favored slang terms for your and the opposite sex's special fun bits? :)

More Creepy Than Sexy

Dear Bath & Body Works,

I would like to suggest that you rethink the subject line of your recent mass e-mail.  Frankly, "FREE Lip Offer!" brought to mind 'Hannibal Lector' and 'vulva' before landing on the possibility that you were touting your new "luscious" lip gloss*.  Seriously folks, semantics!  Look it up. It's rather important to marketing.

Best,

~K

*By the way something that bright pink and sparkly with a big ol' heart on the outside is not something I, nor anyone over the age of 12 (or with the mentality there of), would willingly carry around and wear.

Happy New Year!

 I'm definitely wanting and needing some changes this year. I've felt in the dumps for a while now, my motivation seems to be shite and I feel trapped in most aspects of my life - job, living situation, money, etc. I'm 27 and the world is supposed to be my oyster and instead I feel stuck in a freaking shell of what life is supposed to be!  Poo. The following is a list of general goals I have for the new year and beyond.

1. Get healthier/ lose weight - Also known as the annual resolution for myself and 85% of the population. I need to eat better and actually move my ass.  I'm considering investing in a food/fitness journal and calorie counter to start.  The exercise is especially difficult right now because I? am not an outdoorsy kinda gal to begin with and here in MN it is friggin' COLD and my room doesn't have the, well, room for me to do much. 

2. Read more (of the books I have) - I have shelves of books I have picked up over the years wanting to read that I still haven't gotten around to reading.  Even now I could name at least five titles I've been considering buying!  Note: this is one of the dangers of working in a books store; there is always something new and interesting.

3. Blog more - I've decided to make a 2nd blog strictly for my movie fixation and focus this one more on me.  I want to use this blog as it was originally intended; to get my thoughts and feelings out, be more open/vulnerable, think things out in writing instead of just in my crazy jumbled head so I can get others' thoughts and ideas on things and maybe even find some of the support I'm afraid to ask for.

4. Try a new wine every month - I don't know a whole bunch about wine other than I like it.  Every time I peruse the liquor store I see all sorts of wines that I'd like to try, either because I haven't tried that specific variety of wine before or the label/bottle looks cool and appealing (hey, I'm in graphic design, I notice and judge these things). In the end, I usually go with something I'm familiar with because I'm concerned I won't like it and will thus be wasting my money. Screw that, I'm trying new things this year!  AND I will blog about them! Mwa ha ha haa!  I have even started a list of wines I want to try in an app on my phone. :)

There we have it!  I may add more or adjust some things later, but I wanted to get this first blog of 2011 done and posted before the month (or my thoughts) got away from me.

New Year!

I enjoy this time of year for a couple reasons, but one of them is definitely because it is a small span of time in which I can say things like "I haven't seen you since last year!" which sounds like a long time even though it was last week. Hee hee hee!

Holy Movie Rumors Batman!

On October 13 Deadline.com broke the story that Christopher Nolan drafted Inception star Tom Hardy to join the Bat-team, likely to play a villain.  Now Deadline drops another pearl into the pot with the story that Christopher Nolan is narrowing his list of actresses to play two female lead roles in The Dark Knight Rises, his third installment in the Batfilm 'verse. Nolan always plays close to the chest, so he's keeping mum on the roles, but one role is to be a l<3ve interest for Christian Bale's Bruce Wayne, and the other (presumably) is a villain. The list includes: Rachel Weisz, Naomi Watts, Keira Knightley, Blake Lively, Natalie Portman, and Anne Hathaway. In typical fashion, I have to attack my thoughts on these prospects one at a time in my own list.

Rachel Weisz - This brunette British beauty is probably most well known for her role as the female protagonist, Evy, in the first two installments of the The Mummy films opposite Brendan Fraiser, but Weisz (pronounced "Vice") actually has quite the range of experience; she starred in Darren Aronofsky's period-jumping existential drama The Fountain, portrayed a manipulative art student in The Shape of Things, and, lest we forget, took home a little Oscar for her supporting role in The Constant Gardner opposite Ralph Fiennes.  She has the acting (and action) chops and is gorgeous in a fashion that would work well in the film noir style Nolan has been implementing in the films. She gets my approval.

Naomi Watts - She's definitely been in some great films with some top notch actors and directors; she was the starlet Ann Darrow in Peter Jackson's King Kong, another starlet in David Lynch's psychodrama Mulholland Dr., alongside Clive Owen in The International and opposite Viggo Mortenson's Russian mobster in Eastern Promises.  She's got quite a resume and is not a bad actress.  And yet, every time I hear her name, I mentally shrug and go 'meh'. She's just barely outside the realm of my "What's-Her-Blonde?" list of Hollywood actresses - typically "beautiful" blonde actresses that, while I may recognize their names, have never given a performance actually worthy of my memory space and by all appearances pretty interchangeable.  She's a little bit prettier than those girls though and has done some mentionable work.  She always strikes me as very fragile and her eyebrows always seem to give her a disturbed/annoyed countenance - neither are qualities that lend themselves to an attractive love interest or a sexy but psycho villain. She's kind of a poor-man's Nicole Kidman (of whom I'm no great fan either).  All of this makes me question what role she could possibly do well in this film. I won't be disappointed if she makes the film, but I won't look forward to is for her sake either.

Keira Knightley - Christ on a cracker you've gotta be kidding me! Please cinema Gods, NO! Sure she has action cred under her belt, but that's about it. Here are my arguments against this one: 1) She has the body of a boy! We all remember the to-do over the King Arthur movie poster where they had to add a bump to her front to make it look like she actually had cleavage. Sure, there's a bit there, but nothing that I want to see getting tapped by BW or in a catsuit that's for sure. 2) To my knowledge, she cannot perform an American dialect.  If she can, I doubt it's all that good. Finally 3) While she has the smokey eyes for a Cat Woman character, if I have to watch her all too usual this-is-me-acting-dramatic/angry jaw clench, I may start dry-heaving in the theater.

 

Blake Lively - This blonde bombshell is the relative newb on the list. Most notably she's starred in the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants movies (I saw the first one; don't judge!), is a lead on tele show Gossip Girl (which I have never seen), and was recently seen opposite Jeremy Renner and Ben Affleck in The Town (which I still want to see). She's also already been tapped for another superhero movie, next year's Green Lantern opposite Ryan Reynolds (grrrowl).  Of the little I've seen of her work, she doesn't suck. And she's pretty hot, great smile, has a bod and great hair... so yeah, she gets my OK. But with her already slated for Green Lantern, she may not be set to film another comic movie.




Natalie Portman - Portman has always been touch and go in my book. I definitely did NOT like her performance in the new Star Wars trilogy - but that begs whether it was her or the poor script - and The Other Boleyn Girl was like a really well costumed soap opera .  I thought she did well, though not astonishingly, in Where the Heart Is (total chic flick), The Professional, and Closer. And, of course, I loved V for Vendetta (which shows she's not afraid to do some drastic stuff for her craft). She's also getting early buzz for her turn as an obsessive ballerina in Darren Aronofsky's upcoming Black Swan.  So acting wise, she could pull it off.  Here's my catch, she has a very distinct look and I'm not sure I can picture her in the world Nolan has already set.  But who knows, she could blow us all away.  Tentative approval.

Anne Hathaway - OK, in case you didn't know (and you should by now) I have a massive girl-crush on Ms Hathaway. First of all, she is a fantastic actress; sure she started out in Disney's The Princess Diaries, but she has since gone on to build a resume of good variety; Nicholas Nickelby, Havoc, Brokeback Mountain, The Devil Wears Prada, Becoming Jane, Bride Wars and Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland.  All are excellent films in their own right and cast her alongside many first-class actors. She even got an Oscar nom for her portrayl of a young woman released from rehab for her sister's wedding in Rachel Getting Married.  She can be seen now opposite her Brokeback costar Jake Gylenhaal in the romantic dramedy Love and Other Drugs.  The girl's got chops and she's smokin' hot to boot. Don't believe me? Check out her stipper pole dance in Bride Wars or just about any scene in Devil Wears Prada. And guys, if you just want to see her tits (and she has a great rack) check out Brokeback Mountain (just fast forward if you're too much of a pansy to watch man love).  With her creamy complexion, big brown eyes and awesome talent, she'd be great in any Nolan film, but especially this one. Yes, Hathaway definitely gets my gold star of approval.

Anne in Havoc

Movies: November Edition!

127 Hours (11/5)
The Plot: A mountain climber becomes trapped under a boulder while canyoneering alone near Moab, Utah and resorts to desperate measures in order to survive. Based on the true story of Aron Ralston.
The Players: James Franco, Kate Mara, Amber Tamblyn; directed by Danny Boyle.
The Prospective: It was an awe inspiring story when it happened, now it's brought to our eyes by the amazing Danny Boyle (28 Days Later) and the talent of James Franco (Milk, Spiderman).  Count me in.

Due Date (11/5)
The Plot: High-strung daddy-to-be Peter Highman is forced to hitch a ride with aspiring actor Ethan Tremblay on a road trip in order to make it to his child's birth on time...sit back and watch the humorous chaos.
The Players: Robert Downey Jr, Zach Galifiniakis, Michelle Monaghan, Juliette Lewis, danny McBride; directed by Todd Phillips (The Hangover).
The Prospective: I <3 RDJ and Galifianakis, plus it's the director of The Hangover...this movie will just be cake for me.

Megamind (11/5)
The Plot: The supervillain Megamind finally conquers his nemesis, the hero Metro Man.  When he finds his life pointless without a hero to fight he creates a new hero to fight...but things don't turn out as planned.
The Players:Will Ferrell,Jonah Hill, Brad Pitt,Tina Fey, David Cross; directed by Tom McGrath.

The Prospective: Could be funny, could be a flop...let's watch.  I will say, based on the trailer, Brad Pitt does not have what I would peg as a "super hero" voice, which goes to show what happens when you trade in quality for a name.

Morning Glory (11/12)
The Plot: A hotshot television producer is set the challenge of reviving a struggling morning show program, despite the constant feuding of its high-profile anchors.
The Players: Rachel McAdams, Harrison Ford, Diane Keaton, Patrick Wilson, Jeff Goldblum,; directed by Roger Michell (Enduring Love)
The Prospective: Written by Aline Brosh McKenna (The Devil Wears Prada), produced by Bad Robot (aka JJ Abrams), plus Ford in an uncharacteristic role and the lovely and talented McAdams, I'm a bit excited for this dramedy.

Unstoppable (11/12)
The Plot: A rail company frantically works to prevent an unmanned, half-mile-long freight train carrying combustible liquids and poisonous gas from wiping out a city.
The Players: Denzel Washington, Chris Pine, Rosario Dawson, Ethan Suplee; directed by Tony Scott (Domino)
The Prospective: While this is also the director and main actor duo behind last year's flop The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3, this looks like a decent, albeit basic, plot but with the potential for lots of good suspense and action. Also it will be good to see Chris Pine in something new and I do like Rosario.

Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows: Part 1 (11/19)
This puppy gets special treatment! We all know who's in it, who's directing and what all goes down... and we all can't wait to see it! :D Squeeee!

Burlesque (11/24)
The Plot: A small-town girl ventures to Los Angeles and finds her place in a neo-burlesque club run by a former dancer.
The Players: Christina Aguilera, Cher, Stanley Tucci, Alan Cumming, Eric Dane, Kristen Bell, Cam Gigandet, Peter Gallagher; written and directed by Steven Antin
The Prospective: I dare you not to chuckle at that trailer! It's a story that's been done before, this just has different players - even a couple of good ones! Also, the theater-geek in me does like her some musicals from time to time. In the end, I'll Netflix it; my money is too precious for this.

Love and Other Drugs (11/24)
The Plot: Maggie is an alluring free spirit who won't let anyone - or anything - tie her down. But she meets her match in Jamie, whose relentless and nearly infallible charm serve him well with the ladies and in the cutthroat world of pharmaceutical sales. Maggie and Jamie's evolving relationship takes them both by surprise, as they find themselves under the influence of the ultimate drug: love. Based on Jamie Reidy's memoir Hard Sell: The Evolution of a Viagra Salesman.
The Players: Anne Hathaway, Jake Gyllenhaal, Judy Greer (Archer, 27 Dresses), Hank Azaria, Oliver Platt; directed by Edward Zwick (Glory, Defiance).
The Prospective: Zwick is a great director and I love the premise of the story.  Plus, you all know I have a mad girl-crush on Hathaway.  Add Gyllenhaal, Greer, et al and I'm SOOO seeing this movie!

The King's Speech (11/26) [limited]

The Plot: Tells the story of the man who became King George VI, the father of Queen Elizabeth II. After his brother abdicates, George ('Bertie') reluctantly assumes the throne. Plagued by a dreaded stutter and considered unfit to be king, Bertie engages the help of an unorthodox speech therapist named Lionel Logue. Through a set of unexpected techniques, and as a result of an unlikely friendship, Bertie is able to find his voice and boldly lead the country through war.

The Players: Colin Firth, Geoffrey Rush, Helena Bonham Carter. Guy Pearce, Michael Gambon, ; directed by Tom Hooper.

The Prospective: British historic drama with great British actors; this ought to tickle my Anglophilic fancy.

Tangled (11/26)
The Plot: Disney's version of Rapunzel
The Players: Mandy Moore, Zachary Levi (Chuck), Ron Perlman (Hellboy), Donna Murphy (The Fountain), Jeffry Tambor (Arrested Development); directed by Nathan Greno and Byron Howard.
The Prospective: Interesting that the trailer is very centered on the dude and not the lady.  However, I dig the cute, vindictive chameleon side kick.

Other Notes

Thanks to my awesome friend Steve, I was able to see Soloman Kane; a fantasy/action film based on the Robert E. Howard character starring James Purefoy that, sadly, was not released in the US.  It freakin rocked! If you can find it out there in the webverse, I highly suggest viewing it.

The Next Three Days (11/19) - Starring Russell Crowe, Liam Neeson and Elizabeth Banks, and directed by Paul Haggis (Crash) this is a drama about a married couple and the drama that ensues when she is accused of murder. Three years into her sentence, Lara's husband John is struggling to keep their family together and, realizing his wife's deteriorating condition, he decides to break her out of prison. I should want to see this... but I don't.  What's happening to me? Maybe it's that the plot doesn't speak to me, maybe it's Elizabeth Banks (more on this issue later), I don't know, but I'm just not feeling it right now.